My peak trans moment was when “transgendered” turned into “transgender”. Gender is a noun: I do, indeed, have *a* transgender, but I had spent ten years referring to myself as a “transgendered man”, just as I was a “blue-eyed man.” Suddenly some people on the Internet decided that I was wrong and would pile abuse on anyone who used the term I used myself. Now people use “transgender” as the noun it sounds like, and the same people have the audacity to complain and consider them the problem.
My peak trans moment came when I discovered that the British government made a new law in 2004 that evacuated the word ‘woman’ of meaning. They did this in close consultation with trans activists and at no time during the passage of that bill through parliament were individuals or groups representing the rights of women consulted. At no time were those who have the most legitimate claim to expertise on gender - feminists - consulted. At no time was the impact of gender identity legislation upon the hard won sex-based protections for women raised as a concern. With the passage of the gender recognition act, a male claiming to be a woman is treated as female “for all purposes” in law. THIS IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.
Transactivists shut down (with protests, threats, and physically blocking venues) an annual LGBT community event because there wasn’t “enough” trans inclusion, even though there was more trans representation than lesbian. “Solution” was a lesbian kicked off the community board and a transwoman put in her place.
Transactivists given free rein to say lesbophobic things in local LGBT media with no repercussions. Lesbians who objected were subject to further abuse in media.
Transman attorney files a “friend of the court” brief to get the opportunity to testify at a family court hearing of two lesbians who were dividing their property and determining child custody matters. This transman attorney testified that lesbians can’t get married, therefore the woman with the most financial resources should get all the (communal) property (including the house they bought together and everything in it) and the child outright.
Please put biphobia as one of the taglines/hash tags please, and post anon. :)
As a bisexual man I have noticed how Trans activists will say how Trans and bisexuals are connected/allies, etc. but then they’ll turn around and say how if you are a cisgender man or woman and are bisexual that you’re automatically being Transphobic and that if you don’t identify as “pansexual’ which is just another term for being bisexual but people who are biphobic or ashamed of being bisexual use this term instead of saying they’re bisexual-then you’re a transphobe.
I have also seen Transmen get very angry if you tell them how you prefer to have sex with a cisgender man who has a penis and who doesn’t use a dildo that he’s pretending is a real penis, or have a clit that’s enlarged with hormones that he pretends is a penis.
I want you to post this anon. please.
I grew disinterested with Trans rights when I saw trans people attacking cisgender people or anyone who is not trans. I also saw how Trans people would become completely hypocritical and get VERY biphobic, homophobic, and heterophobic and say how if you’re bisexual, gay/lesbian, or straight how you’re automatically transphobic despite the fact that bisexuals, some gay men and lesbians, and straight people do date and have relationships with Transmen and Transwomen, and just because someone is bisexual, gay/lesbian, or hetero it does not mean that they’re bigoted or transphobic. I also remember how ENDA (Employment Non-Discrimination Act) was very, very close to passing and Trans activists flipped out and made sure it would not pass at all despite the decades of hard work that bisexuals, lesbians, and gay men had in trying to get it passed and get equality for everyone, and eventually they would have added gender/Transgender protection as a law to protect TS/TG people in the workplace.
I’d already been cringing a bit at transactivists arguing that all kids who display cross-gender identification should be put on the path to transition - even the original Dutch researchers who advocated hormones and surgery for transgender teens said they didn’t recommend transition for kids, because the majority of them don’t grow up to be transgender.
Then I saw a transactivist saying that it doesn’t matter how many of these kids will grow up to be non-trans - it’s more important to make sure that all the ones who do continue to identify as trans get the surgery while they’re young. Hey, who cares if two cis kids get irreversible surgery for every trans kid who gets to transition before they’re eighteen?
It began years ago when I was on the phone with a friend and she started crying and accused me of triggering her when I mentioned the fact that I felt we couldn’t divorce ourselves from our histories just because we wished we didn’t have them.
I began asking around. Almost nobody was willing to own up to their histories. I tried to be diplomatic, to be as careful with my wording as I possibly could. All I got was denial and abuse.
It opened my eyes. Up until then I’d been a committed trans activist who tried to incorporate feminism in to my activism. Since then I’ve been absolutely frustrated and appalled by the state of trans activist discourse.
Honestly, it also seems to me like I’m not the only one who’s getting sick of it. This blog is testament to that. And I know so many people who were once enthusiastic allies who have been turned off by the antifeminist vitriol, the hijacking of spaces and conversations, the whole “cotton ceiling” concept, the insistence that menstruation and female bodies are triggering and “transphobic,” and so many other things. Even those who are still sympathetic to trans arguments about gender are put off by the violent rhetoric and stalking directed at anybody who so much as mildly disagrees.
And because it needs to be said again. TW: Menstruation. Really? Are you fucking kidding me?
My peak trans moment was probably when I heard trans activists talking about reproductive rights and abortion. “If you say that being pro-life is misogynist, then you’re transphobic”, “Your rhetoric excludes men who can get pregnant”, “Abortion isn’t a women’s issue; I’m a woman and I don’t even have a uterus”, and that sort of thing. This was a point I could not and would not compromise on.